Tuesday, January 12, 2010
he told me what he really wanted to say last night. 11/01/2010. finally. never expected this day would arrive on me. all the empty promises he made. while im listening to mp3, alot of songs are singing how i feel. im living, but im barely breathing. when im walking my dog today. the crazy auntie came and talked to me abt alot of things again. suddenly she asked, eh the tall guy always with u de is ur brother or bf. i took awhile before replying her its my bf. we been staying here for two years. don know why she choose this time to ask this. when u don wan to mention abt him, someone will just do it. and hurt me once again. its just so contradicting. life is so irony. i just want to keep all our memories in a very BIG box, cos 4 years is a long period so i really need a big box. i jus wan to keep all the things that would remind me of him. so much so that i would really need to change my whole wardrode, wallet, bag and lots and lots of things. even the blanket and pillow are all from him. i just want to keep it away from myself. cause its hurting me too much. someone i loved so much. someone who is so impt to me more than myself. is giving me up. im really curious about alot of things. but i didnt want to ask anymore.i have oled been smashed into pieces. real tiny little pieces. its so hard to put it all back in one piece now. i know deep down inside my heart im still hoping. a very very very small hope.
